In the past decade, elaborate marriage proposals have gained popularity with the rise of social media, claiming its own branch of the billion dollar wedding industry. According to The Knot, nearly 40% of all American proposals occur during the period of time between Thanksgiving to Valentine’s Day, earning the well-deserved title of “proposal season.” With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, this year's proposal season is quickly coming to a close. To wrap up the season, we spoke with local experts in the industry for behind-the-scenes advice on popping the question.
From a ring that WOWs to capturing Instagram-worthy photos, there are many things to consider when planning your special moment. Here’s what we learned:
Put a Ring On It — Chuck Konderla, Fifth 'C' Fine Jewelry
Before you can think about getting down on one knee, you need to complete the most important part: finding the perfect engagement ring! Specializing in custom jewelry, local business owner Chuck Konderla of Fifth ‘C’ Fine Jewelry has spent the last 30 years designing engagement rings and says he's learned a few tips on how to make the process go smoothly.
“There’s a fork in the road with two different kinds of guys shopping for engagement rings,” Chuck says. “On one hand, there are the guys that are fairly well-researched; this is the ‘how much guy.’ He’s asking questions like ‘how much is a one carat diamond? How much is a platinum setting?’, and I can immediately tell he has an idea of what he’s looking for.”
As a custom jeweler, all of Chuck’s work start with a consultation. For the “how much guy,” he says the consultation typically consists of stating his budget and then going over what that will cover. Typically these men normally have a good idea of the style they’re looking for, so Chuck will help him translate that into a design that fits his monetary boundaries.
“On the other hand, there’s the ‘ground zero guy,’ who knows he needs a ring, but doesn’t exactly know where to start,” Chuck says. “With this guy, we explore options, terminology, and the four Cs of diamonds to help him understand what things might cost in order to meet his budget.”
Chuck also recommends using social media like Pinterest to gather ideas. With over 38 million user-generated idea boards dedicated to all things wedding, Pinterest is a great resource for getting an idea of what your soon-to-be fiance likes. Chuck and the client can even pull up her Pinterest together and walk through different designs she has saved; “It’s such a great trail of breadcrumbs to follow,” he says.
“You don't need to hold my hand and jump off a bridge with me,” Chuck says. “We go through every step together until you absolutely nail where you need to be on budget and a design that will blow her away.”
When setting an engagement ring budget, Chuck says the average range for his clients is typically $4,000 to $10,000, but “it should pinch, not bleed, and we are happy to accommodate any budget.”
“I tell people to pray on it,” Chuck says. “This is a material object that you're using to express the love that God has put in your heart for your intended, so you certainly want it to be special, for her and for you.”
His final, but favorite piece of advice when shopping for a ring is to remember the purpose of the purchase.
“A lot of men get so tied up in the budget, the design, what she’ll think, what her best friends will say, getting her finger size and all of that stuff that they forget the reason why they’re sitting in my office,” Chuck says. “My favorite part about what I do is I pray over each ring with my clients to refocus them on why they’re here — the gift of marriage. These men are about to go out and change someone’s life with that ring, and all glory to God for that.”
Frame the Moment — Flame Dong, Flame Dong Photography
Hiring a photographer to capture the big moment is the perfect way to save that cherished memory forever and that’s where professionals like Flame Dong of Flame Dong Photography come in to save the day. With dozens of Aggie weddings and engagements now under her belt, Flame shared some of her favorite tips for young men looking to book a photographer for their marriage proposal.
“There are a few things to consider before you book, but my biggest suggestions are do your research and reach out much earlier than you think,” Flame says.
Once you find photographers in your area, it is a good idea to look through their portfolio to get a feel for their style, she says. Each photographer's style can be drastically different, ranging from soft golden tones to moody earthy tones and everything in between, so it’s important to find one that fits you and your fiancé-to-be.
“During the initial consultation, I ask them the basic details like where it is, what they will be doing, what time they’re doing it because I want to be prepared, but I also want them to get the most out of their money,” Flame says. “I always suggest doing it at golden hour to avoid harsh lighting. Those are the kinds of details that he may not necessarily think about, but could affect the quality of the pictures.”
Staying within your personal budget is also important. For a proposal session, Flame’s prices start at $400, but she recommends getting multiple quotes before booking. To ensure you get the photographer you want, make sure to book them well in advance, she adds.
“Usually guys reach out about two weeks prior, but I would recommend at least a month,” Flame says. “Reaching out earlier also gives you more time to work out those smaller details. This is your big moment with your future spouse, so you want to be present in that moment.”
For day-of advice, Flame emphasizes, “stay on your knee longer than you think!”
“A lot of guys are down and up very quickly,” Flame says. “I know it’s the excitement of it, but I think that one main part is super important, so I always tell them to stay on their knee for at least 30 seconds, if not more.”
And lastly, don’t worry about the photographer! Flame says it’s a common misconception that a photographer could be distracting or even ‘give away’ the surprise.
“It’s always funny, because it could be 20 minutes in, and they’ll just look at me and say ‘oh my gosh, you’re here!’ because they didn’t notice until just then,” Flame says. “I’ve heard of people trying to hide in the bushes to be discreet, but in reality, once it’s in motion the girl already knows what’s going on and both of them get caught up in that moment, so it’s like I’m invisible. There’s never been any awkwardness.”
Setting the Scene — Teri Wolfskill, Alpha-Lit B/CS
Hiring professional decoration vendors is an increasing trend in recent proposals. According to a 2022 study by The Knot, nearly one in four couples used professional vendors for their proposal, and custom neon signs and marquee letters have been steadily growing in popularity.
Alpha-Lit B/CS is a family-owned marquee letter rental service that opened their doors in 2021. Owner Teri Wolfskill shared some advice on working with decoration rentals like her own and provided more information on what to expect.
“Every vendor is here to help make your day really special,” Teri says. “For something as special as a proposal, it’s important to go from your heart and stick with that vision, and we’re here to make your vision come true.”
Teri says Alpha-Lit has over 200 marquee letters, numbers and symbols, to accommodate just about everyone; and what they don’t have, they can get! All set-ups are rented for a full day, with the Alpha-Lit team taking care of the transportation of the letters as well as set-up and clean-up. Typically, clients spend around $200-$500 per set, with larger scale jobs reaching upwards of $1,000.
“The only thing that will cost extra is color bulbs or changing the color of the letter,” Teri says. “There’s also an additional fee if we stack it or triple stack it. It's all very transparent pricing.”
As a local marquee rental, Teri says they have worked together with other vendors like florists and balloon vendors for more elaborate designs.
“We did one in Century Square recently where we had about an hour to set up while they were eating dinner,” Teri says. “We had it in the green area with flowers all around the front; it turned out really beautiful!”
Like other vendors, working with decoration rentals requires planning in advance to ensure that there will be availability. Alpha-Lit requires that each event is paid in full two weeks prior, so reaching out about a month beforehand is advised.
“We completely go off of the clients schedule,” Teri says. “A proposal is such an exciting thing and we know it can be very stressful. We don't ever want to make it harder and say, ‘well, you have to be here this time,’ so we always work off of them.”
Enlisting Help from the Pros — Erin Joyner, Wonderfully Wed
If you’re still stumped on where to start, hiring a proposal planner may be the ideal option. It’s no secret that marriage proposals have blown up in recent years; according to The Knot, about half of proposers feel pressure to plan a unique experience to ask for their partner’s hand. To take off the extra stress, more people are enlisting expert help.
Planners can help translate a vision to reality, coordinate with vendors and make sure the special day runs smoothly, says Erin Joyner, the owner and executive coordinator of Wonderfully Wed, a Bryan/College Station wedding planning company, who offers a proposal package for overwhelmed groom-to-be's. By removing the stress of smaller details, Erin says her clients are able to focus their efforts on the things that truly matter: being fully present and soaking up that intimate moment.
“You're already going to be nervous about all the details, and there's so many things to think about, especially because most people want it to be a surprise,” Erin says. “Hiring a professional eases some of that stress, but even if that isn’t an option for you, I always recommend getting friends or family to set everything up for you so you don't have to worry about that.”
Erin says that their highest clientele for the proposal package are out-of-towners looking to return to Aggieland to pop the question.
“They usually send us pictures of something that they've seen that they really like, and we’ll try to replicate that,” Erin says. “They hire us really just to set up the location so they don’t have to bring anything in from out of town. We’ll get all the things for them like flower arrangements, candles, signs and make sure it’s all ready in time.”
Pricing varies based on the scope of the proposal; “we’ve done everything from $350 to $1,000,” she says.
“For us, planning a proposal is simple, but that’s because we aren’t the ones proposing and we also do this regularly on a much bigger scale,” Erin says. “When you are the one actually proposing, you’re already flustered and worried about that part of it, so for some people it’s worth it to spend a little extra money just to be able to walk up, propose and be in that moment together.”
The Grand Finale
Undeniably, expectations for marriage proposals have skyrocketed. In a time where proposals involve elaborate setups, professional photographers and intricate decorations, there's a risk of overshadowing the genuine and intimate essence of the moment.
In the end, whether it's a grand Parisian affair, an intimate park proposal, or something in between, what remains is the authenticity and significance of the commitment made. As couples navigate the delicate balance between societal expectations and personal sentiments, what ultimately defines a perfect proposal is the genuine connection and shared love between two individuals.
